“What am I supposed to do?” These words are so common among spiritual seekers that there is not a week that goes by that I don’t hear them. These words, in this context, come from a deep yearning and a desire to be on the right path. People want to know what god or the Universe wants of them, what use of their gifts will make the world better, what will reward them, finally, with fulfillment or resolve or true love. For years now, I’ve encountered these words as frequently and as regularly as I do a highway mile marker on a road trip. There it is. And there. And there. And… yep.
But the thing is, there is no “supposed to.” There is no “should.”
One of many many things we learn along our journey of spiritual awakening is that we are all connected. We are all one. And in our oneness, we are all divine. Yes, that’s right, we—all of us—are god. Separation and distance are illusions, just as much as time is. They’re “real” in this world as constructs. Separation allows for the combined physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual bodies in which we have chosen to learn very hard lessons here on Earth, and time marks progression or growth or regression or decay as we do so. What is real, what is Home, is the beautiful Everything that is love and potential and creation and light.
We chose to incarnate here on Earth to continue learning, to continue growing as souls, as part of the collective of All. As souls and extensions of All, we chose to do this. We chose our roles and our lessons, our challenges and our triumphs, those who will make our lives easier and those who will make our lives harder. We chose what we would look like, who we would love, where we would live, and yes, what we would do.
In this reality, there is no judgment. There is no good or bad. There aren’t even mistakes, only lessons.
To ask ourselves, “What am I supposed to do?” takes away our power and puts it squarely in the hands of another. Another god. Another universe. Another person even—a teacher, maybe, or a coach, or a spiritual advisor, or a mentor. But, WE are god. WE are the universe. And WE are responsible for our own choices and actions. There is no judgmental father figure in the clouds deciding your fate. There is no scowling prophet with a rule book and a big stick. And no true spirit guide will ever tell you what you’re “supposed to do,” they’ll only lead you, guide you, and teach you how to make your decisions for yourself.
So try this: instead of asking yourself “What am I supposed to do?”, take a deep breath. As you exhale, allow yourself to connect with the energy at the center of you, which incidentally is also the energy at the center of Everything, of pure Love. Then ask yourself “What do I WANT to do.”
See the difference?
Some may read these words and scoff—seeing in them a potential carte blanche for people to take base action or make “bad” decisions just because they want to. Because without a moral compass so connected to the rules or role models of religion, what are we? But no. That is not what I am presenting here. Along our journey we experience opportunities to learn. When we meet these opportunities and grow from them, when we see our emotions as pathways to light and embrace the positive ones and transform the challenging ones, we are actively choosing love. We liberate ourselves from behavioral, mental, or emotional patterns that may have been keeping us in line or in place. We release ourselves from the emotions that hold us, like fear, anger, powerlessness, or worthlessness, and with each step along the way, immerse ourselves deeper and deeper in love.
If ever in doubt, ask yourself this simple question before acting: “Is this of love?” If the answer is yes, then go. If the answer is no, then you have found yet another opportunity to learn, transform, forgive, or release emotion to clear the way for next time. Is this a moral compass? You decide.
I encourage you to take back your power. When you do, when you allow yourself to see yourself as you really are, with all your beautiful talents and interests and interconnected lessons learned, you will know what to do. Then go do that. And if challenges arise along the way? Excellent. What you’ve found is another beautiful opportunity to learn.
In the process, you will live. You will step out empowered and fully engaged in your own beautiful life. You will also realize that the Nirvana you were seeking—that reward of fulfillment or resolve or true love that kept you asking about “supposed to” or “should”… well, there it is. And there. And there. And… yep.